Struggling Well With Life

When I was convinced to blog on this site, I was told that it would be good for me, even therapeutic at times. Today is one of those times I am hoping for some therapeutic benefit. This is not one of those set ups for encouragement, really, rather a place just to unload. Last weekend was a weekend with absolutely no margins, every hour was booked, and I had the privilege to preach at our services. I studied, prepared and felt ready. At Saturday night’s service, as we were singing just before I was to get up to preach I felt this great calm, and looked forward to the time to open the Word. I don’t know what happened, but from the first minute of my message - Mark left the building, I had nothing, no life. Gone! It was painful, and I was so disappointed in myself. Tied to a manuscript I wandered through to a conclusion. Now I know that God promises His word will not return void, in fact I am claiming that promise, but in my find I failed. The delivery was so poor that it was distracting, and if the preacher becomes the distraction, the message can be easily lost. Sunday went fine, but I am still beating myself up about Saturday. Ever feel like you blew it? Here is the gist of the weekend’s message - God is WITH us. I have to practice what I preach. God is with me, whether I am hitting it out of the park, sitting on the bench, or striking out. My heart needs that perspective today, and I need to get over myself. There, that feels better. Thanks for listening.

I am sitting in my office and I can hear Christmas carols from another office.  It sounds so happy on the other side of the wall.  I am fighting today to be happy, or even at peace - with so much going on in the lives of folks, and in my own life.  This time of year seems to intensify the tensions that we are typically able to navigate.  Not doing too well.  Trusting that God will meet me in the routines of another day.