Posted on January 3, 2012 at 6:19am.
Reading about the “living hope” we have in 1 Peter, and realizing that so many of the things I hope for are not at all what he is talking about here. My hope has to be in Christ, not in what he may or may not do for me, but in Him and Him alone. There are so many things I long for in my life, and in the lives of those around me and these things are good, but none really promised to me. Hope for me is reduced to this simple truth, that no matter what - I am not alone, I am in Christ and Christ is with me. I think that’s pretty much it. Relationships may or may not be restored, health may or may not be mine, my children may or may not fall in harm’s way, and the list continues. To put my hope in any of these things will leave me where I have already lived - disappointed and confused. He has called me to hope, and that hope is found solely in Him. I have lost my way again, putting my hope in the things of this world, the things I wish we’re different. My hope has been based in a wish list. Forgive me Lord, I took my eyes off of you.
Posted on January 2, 2012 at 10:13am.
Today is a big day. It is the official close to the holiday season, and I must finish well. At our house we move right out of Christmas and into birthday mode. Meg turned 19 yesterday, and Terri took a further step into her fifties today. Looking for the energy and momentum to finish strong. We all had breakfast in bed with her, and I have to pull off one more special meal. I think it is going to be a Pasta Provisions catered event. Cannolis with a candle will have to take the place of cake. How fun to have the girls home. How grateful I am for all three of my women. Terri deserves to feel special today, no matter how much we have already celebrated. She is a good woman, a very good woman.
Posted on December 31, 2011 at 4:41pm.
I need a fresh start. I am holding on by the skin of my teeth to the disciplines in my life, in fact that is an overstatement, I am blowing it. I feel like a blob, out of control and out of sync. Today was an incredible Spring day smack dab at the end of December. I was either going to eat another plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies, or go for a run. Not strong enough to go on my own, so I made a call to a friend. It was either a run or hunkering down in gluttony again. My buddy answered the phone and met me 10 minutes later. All of my disciplines seem connected, and if one falls the others follow like dominoes. So this is much more than just eating. The run was a small victory. We are having communion at our services this weekend, and good time to realign my heart and mind. Happy New Year.
Posted on December 26, 2011 at 12:04pm.
A Christmas tradition for me happens very late on Christmas night. Whenever all the excitement comes to an end, and one by one each person makes their way to bed, I wait for about 15 minutes and then kick into high gear. By 12:15am this morning the inside of our house was stripped of all that is Christmas, and the tree was placed at the curb. This year took a bit longer as a practical joke left us with an additional 200 gold balls on the tree. Someone in our house claimed to “notice everything”, so each week of December 50 additional gold balls were added to a six and a half foot tree. It was so loaded the branches were dropping them at odd times, day and night. Someone never noticed. The joy this brought every time I passed the tree all month - priceless. Though the joke was on me, as I was still finding those blasted balls on the tree even out at the curb.
Posted on December 24, 2011 at 7:05am.
About to celebrate a very old feeling Christmas. Everything is old, everybody is old. No more little girls with pig tails and those soft one piece footed PJ’s. No big surprises under the tree. No bikes, no American Girl Dolls, no anticipation of knocking their socks off. In fact the older they get, the smaller and more expensive their gifts become, which means a lot less to open, and a stocking full of toiletries. Toiletries, that’s a horrible word.. I picked my dad up last night from the airport, and he’s old too. I guess he would have to be if his youngest son is 51. That bigger than life intimidating man seems so gentle and even fragile. Even our dog is old, she appears put out when she moves from one place to sleep to another. Older too is my relationship with Jesus which is a good thing, but I fear I have grown accustomed to the Gift. May the Spirit of Christ who makes all things new open my eyes and heart to this reality today.
